You Know You’re From Utah When…

I got inspired by a friend of mine to write a blog post all about Utah. The good, the bad, the ugly, and the down right hilarious sides of it. If you aren’t from Utah enjoy reading about the wonderful and crazy things that go on there. And if you are from Utah, I hope you find this as fun as I did!

Thank you to all my Utah friends that helped me write this! You’re all amazing.

 

  • Everything is closed on Sunday.
  • And if you’ve moved away you vow to never live in Utah again.
  • You plan your alcohol runs around holidays and Sundays. And you make damn sure you get there before the liquor store closes.
    state liquor store
  • You know what a molly-Mormon is.
  • You know what “real” mountains look like.
  • You get lost without said mountains as your guide.
    mt
  • People assume you’re Mormon.
  • You hear the words sluff, biff, fetch, flip, eff, fetcher, and heck and know exactly what they mean.
  • You know the “Holy War” isn’t about the crusades.
  • Everyone with a camera is a “photographer”
  • You are an avid Jazz fan.
  • You are pissed as hell at Gordon Hayward.
  • The smell of dog food means there’s a west wind. (For all my Ogden friends)
  • You know what fry sauce is. And you automatically ask for mayonnaise with your ketchup in every other state.
  • You know what the “slots” are in Utah.
  • When you are under 20 at least 5 of your closest friends are married.
  • You gladly drink 3.2 beer because you don’t know any better.
  • You have learned all the weird liquor laws.
  • Funeral potatoes are your favorite!
  • Modest is hottest!
  • You’ve gone on a date to see the lights at Temple Square.
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  • Coffee isn’t the highest sold drink at Starbucks.
  • Day dates before dances are as big or bigger than the actual dance.
  • You love the DI! Either because you get some awesome stuff there or you can easily unload a ton of shit there. And you actually know what the DI is.
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  • Driving in the snow is no big deal.
  • You have driven to WY to get illegal fireworks and Four Loko.
  • You can experience all 4 seasons in just a few days and in the middle of summer.
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  • You celebrate holidays like Halloween and the 4th of July on Saturday if they land on Sunday.
  • You either have an interesting way of swearing or you know what they mean when they say those interesting words.
  • You aren’t sure if there are more Mormon churches or Mavericks.
  • Separation of church and state… What is that?
  • You are either in the Mormon club or you are an outcast.
  • When you go out of town and they learn you are from Utah the first question you get is either if you are Mormon and/or how many moms you have.
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  • You know your state has an extremely high opioid epidemic in the country. Along with the highest national rate of teen suicide and a high national rate for anti depressants.
  • You’ve been cliff jumping.
  • You know the Great Salt Lake is really just a stinky gross vast expanse of land filled with a shit ton of salt and very little water.
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  • You know all about green jello.
  • You NEVER got a snow day. I mean literally never in your life have you had a snow day!
  • You are used to the endless road construction.
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  • You know how to correctly pronounce Weber and Webber.
  • You know so many different versions of swear words it’s a bit embarrassing.
  • You know what a “Utah Scone” is and you absolutely love them and miss them when you move.
    Scones
  • You wear a t-shirt under a spaghetti strap/dress
  • You measure travel in TIME, not DISTANCE…
  • You try and be extra creative when naming your children. Add in a few useless letters, it’s fine!
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  • You do not pronounce your T’s when you say words like mountain, hunting, Layton, etc. but you vehemently deny having a “Utah accent.” Think “mou’ns”  and “Lay’un.”
  • Tooele is pronounced “Too-will-a”, Hooper is pronounced “Hupper”, Hurricane is pronounced “Hur-i-can” (with a short “i”). Egg is pronounced “aigg”, Mirror is pronounced “Mir.” Drawer is pronounced “Drar.” Milk is pronounced “Melk.”
  • You have your wedding dress or prom dress altered to add sleeves.
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  • If you have tattoos or any form of body modification you know you will be judged and get dirty looks.
  • When you move to a new area and neighbors find out you don’t go to church, better believe the missionaries will show up.
  • You know that when you get to the airport or fly home there will most definitely be a large group of people with balloons and signs welcoming home a missionary, without fail.
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  • You have so many friends who are part of pyramid schemes like It Works, Avon, Doterra, Perfectly Posh, Scentsy, etc. and you secretly hate them all.
  • “Your poop hole is considered a loop hole” rule to stay a virgin.
  • The 24th of July is a bigger event than the 4th of July.
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  • You know what a Mormon assault vehicle is.
  • Are my friends and I the only ones that think some of the original settlers’ descendants all look alike (in breeders).
  • You know what “Jesus Jammies” are.
  • You have had the Utah poof or you dated a Utah poof girl.
    utah hair

 

 

Happiness

As many of you know I am in school and one of my classes this semester is “Psychology of Modern Life.” I read an article by Arnold Lazarus and Allen Fay titles Unhappiness Is Self-Created and it made me think of my dad and how often he tried to teach me this very lesson. Once again, you were right, dad. ❤

The gist of this article focuses around the old saying “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.” The way Lazarus and Fay explain it is very simple. The way Lazarus and Fay explain it is very simple. As children, we are taught this saying about sticks and stones but we don’t take is seriously as adults. When something upsets us we say “His remark upset me!” “It made me unhappy when he left.” “He made me angry.” We are putting the blame on someone else when in reality we should be saying “I hurt myself over his remark.” “I made myself upset when he left.” and “I allowed myself to get angry when he acted in such a way.” As long as we incorrectly blame outside sources for our unhappiness we will never be able to do anything about them.

The first step to remedying this habit is to ask “How exactly am I upsetting myself?” If the answer to that question contains a lot of negative self-statements, challenge each one of them. You will hit a point where you realize the control resides in your head and not in external forces.

The second way to help change your behavior is to talk to your friends, family, and coworkers about the relationship between external events and people’s reactions to those events. Teaching/talking is a great way to learn something yourself and put it into action.

And last but not least, whenever you catch yourself falsely attributing your own feelings to external events, write it down. Keep a record of it in a notebook or in your phone; somewhere easily accessible. And make the notation as soon as possible so you don’t forget it! Then the following day, give yourself a few minutes to reflect on the times you wrote down the previous day. Correct the faulty reasoning and move on.

Mind you there are always exceptions to this rule. For example; if your sister, mother, brother, daughter, friend, etc. were to be raped or intentionally hurt you should be upset and stand up for those injustices. It’s how you stand up for the victim that can cause you problems, but that is another topic entirely.

 

 

Nomination

I got tagged/nominated to participate in a fun little blog questionnaire thing. This is the first time this has happened to me and I’m pretty excited about it. She tagged me 5 days ago but we’ve been so busy with the 4th of July and school that I am just getting to it. 😦 Sorry about that. Anyway, Bexer’s Blog is a fun read that I enjoy checking in on weekly and reading what she and her family are up to. She is a strong mama who puts her family first, and that’s always a good thing in my book! So thank you for the tag!

Here are the questions she wanted her nominees to answer:

  1. What made you start your blog? (Totally stole that one, but it’s ok because so did she)
    I wanted a place where I could be completely honest about what was going on with my postpartum, children, and life. I wanted somewhere I could potentially connect with other women who were struggling with similar issues or who had struggled with similar issues. I also wanted a place I could be 100% myself. 🙂
  2. If you could re-live one day but not change it in any way which one would it be?
    The day(s) I gave birth to both my boys. Those were the most incredible days of my life. I know it says one day but I can’t pick one over the other, they were both so special in their own ways.
  3. How long have you been friends with your oldest friend?
    Courtney Murakami and I have been friends since we were 3 years old and met at preschool. Terri (Shupe) Smith and I have also been friends since we were about that age. Our families knew each other before we were born but are you really friends with someone before around 3 years old? Unfortunately, both women live in Utah still and we haven’t been the best at keeping up with each other.
  4. Do you like psychological thriller type movies?
    I love these types of movies! I especially like movies or shows about serial killers or crime. They are my guilty pleasure.
  5. If you could only eat one food for a week what would it be?
    This one is really hard. I would probably have to say mashed potatoes, but only if I made them.
  6. What is your favorite number? Is there a reason that it’s your favorite?
    My favorite number is 4. My two favorite holidays are on the 4th of their respective months; my birthday in March and the 4th of July.
  7. Did you ever get to name a childhood pet?
    No, never. My mom was not big on pets but the few we did have were named by my parents and our cat was named by my little brother.
  8. Have you ever been skydiving?
    No, and I have no intention of ever going. It would give me way too much anxiety. I just don’t think it’s worth it. ahahaha
  9. Have you read the Harry Potter series?
    YES!!! If you haven’t I’m not sure if we are really even friends. ahaha
  10. Have you ever seen the sunrise at the beach?
    I have seen the sunrise at a beach a handful of times. The most recent time was when I was visiting my soon to be husband in San Francisco. I had really bad anxiety about leaving Cash in Utah and so we got up early and went for a walk down to the pier and watched the sunrise over the bay.
  11. Who is your favorite author or what is your favorite book?
    This one is really hard for me. I love to read and can never pick just one. I don’t have a favorite author but the book I really fell in love with recently is called “The Knightengale” by Kristin Hannah.

 

My questions are:

  1. What made you start your blog? (Totally stole that one, but it’s ok because so did the two bloggers before me)
  2. What is your drink of choice?
  3. Who is your favorite musician/artist/group/band?
  4. What song to you listen to when you want to get pumped up?
  5. Have you ever traveled to another continent?
  6. If you could travel anywhere where would you go and why?
  7. If you could change one thing about your life what would it be?
  8. What is your favorite pastime and why?
  9. Do you prefer Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter?
  10. What is your most prized possession? (I also stole this one because I thought it was an awesome question.)

My nominees are:

Queerly Texan 

The ShittyHousewife 

BeautyBeyondBones

Chicmom2016

DarleneDee

Abbeycoseattle

Gentlemen’s Foundry

Loveonastick

J.A. Allen

ThisLittleMom

And don’t worry if you don’t want to participate. I’m tagging you because I truly do enjoy reading your blogs!

Weird Mom Issues

Hello, everyone!


I came across an interesting article that was talking about the 7 things she’s weird about now that she has children. I can relate to some of them, some of them I don’t care about, and some of them I am also weird about but for very different reasons. Now she’s not talking about watching a TV show that has a child being hurt and crying over it, I think that’s completely normal and no one thinks you’re a weirdo for crying. Literally, every mom has done it. And if you say you haven’t, well you’re a fucking liar. Sorry, but you are. She’s talking about things you would never think would worry you or make you think twice but now that you have a small human life completely depending on you to keep it alive shit has changed. Life just got really fucking complicated and hard all of a sudden. Welcome to parenthood!

Welcome to parenthood!

Number 1 on her list is baked goods. She explains that she used to love any kind of baked goods and would never turn them down given the opportunity. However, now that she has had children and has had the pleasure of having “helping hands” in the kitchen she will not eat any baked goods at bake sales, church, etc. Kids are gross. Plain and simple. They don’t have any concept of germs or proper cooking etiquette. Their spit, dirty fingers, and boogers get all up in whatever it is you’re cooking. I understand why she would be weird about it, but I’m going to be completely honest, I don’t care. I ate that shit before and I’m not dead. I’ll eat it now. I will add to this confession though, my kids boogers, spit, and dirty fingers/toes don’t gross me out and the same goes for our friends’ kids. My husband, on the other hand, is not a fan at all!

Number 2 on her list is being home alone at night. She’s very protective now that she’s a mother. Every little noise and creak brings out her inner mama bear, and honestly who can blame her. I get scared very easily when I’m home alone but this is nothing new. It was happening long before I had children. I am a big fan of murder shows like Snapped, Dateline, I Almost Got Away With It, Criminal Minds, etc. I also love watching anything about serial killers; documentaries, movies, true crime tv, you name it I will enjoy it. I have had psychologists tell me I need to stop watching shows like this because it is making my anxiety worse than it already is, and they are probably right. But I like these types of shows, they make me happy …. at the time. However, a few weeks later when I’m home alone or home with the kids (yes, even in the middle of the day) and I hear a weird noise I punch in the numbers for 911 and have my finger ready to hit the dial button. But I will say now that I have had children, especially if they are home with me, the panic is much worse. My mind goes to the absolute worst thing and I have a little panic attack before I can talk myself into sanity.

Number 3 on her list is flying. I completely relate to this one. She describes my usual flight with my children. The kids are happy on their various electronics or with their toys while I am thinking of every possible outcome if something were to go wrong. Every little bit of turbulence (and there’s a lot of that flying out of Utah) makes my mind go to the worst place possible. The worst part for me is take off and landing. I’m not sure why but I think it’s probably because that is the loudest and most jerky part of the flight. We are usually flying out of Oakland so we are flying out over the water and I imagine the plane nose diving into the Bay. EVERY FUCKING TIME. I think about what I would do if something were to happen, how would I save both the boys, how would I save myself, etc. It’s exhausting. The author of this post also made a comment about missing in-flight cocktails and I’m here to say fuck that. Get the cocktail. Hell, get two or three. You’re flying with children, you deserve/need it. A fun tip I’ve learned is that Southwest flight attendants are amazing! They will help entertain your kids and give you free cocktails when they can see you’re struggling. I am so thankful for those men and women!

Number 4 on her list is convenience stores and banks. After reading this one I thought to myself that she may need to go talk to someone. She sounds like a nervous wreck! She gets worried about going into a bank and what would happen if it got robbed. She wouldn’t be able to keep your infant quite… Umm… No, that’s not what I’m thinking about when I have to go anywhere in public with my kids. What I’m thinking is “GOD! This double stroller is a joke. Is it even going to fit through the door? Can I get some help here?” “Please stop asking for things. I just want to get bread and get out of here!” “Please stop touching things!” Ugh, the list goes on and on! I don’t every worry about someone hurting myself or my children while at a store or bank, which is shocking for me. I simply don’t want the struggle and stress of taking a 4-year-old and an 18-month-old in and out of their car seats to go anywhere.

Number 5 on her list is waterskiing and contact sports. After reading this I am positive this woman is a basket case. She prefers to avoid sports that could permanently injure her because then there would be no one to take care of her children. I have no second thoughts about that. My issue is that I can’t go underwater without plugging my nose. (Yeah, I know. It’s very childish and ridiculous. But it freaks me out and gives me anxiety for some reason) Which means any sort of water sport is out for me. I used to play touch football with the boys before I had Cash. After I had Cash someone had to watch the baby and it was always me, which meant I couldn’t play. But the random times I didn’t have him I would still get in there!

Number 6 on her list is being out on the town for New Year’s Eve. She prefers to be at home while her kids are in their rooms safely asleep instead of risking to have them all run off the road by a drunk driver. I have a few things to say to this… First, why are you bringing your kids to a party?!?! Second, have you ever heard of a babysitter? And third, girl, you need to have some time out with your husband and New Year’s is the best excuse you could ever have. Go out and have fun! Anyone that knows me knows I have no issue leaving my kids with a sitter and going out on the town, with or without my husband. I need that time away from my kids for my own sanity.

Number 7 on her list is subways and elevators. Yup! FUCKING TERRIFYING! However, this is another one where our fears are a little different. She’s scared her child will get in the elevator, the doors will shut, and they will be taken away somewhere without her. My terror comes from that story about a woman who was on an escalator with her son (I think) and as they came to the top of the elevator the floor (still part of the elevator, you all know what I’m talking about) fell out from beneath them. She threw her son to an onlooker and she fell into the gears (mechanics, machine or whatever you call it) of the escalator. Oh my god! I can not even imagine. Every time I get on and off Bart now unless I’m with my husband because he makes fun of me for doing these types of things, I do a little hop and jump over that part.

There are so many other things that I find terrifying that most people probably think are weird, but most of mine were there long before I had children. For example subways, especially Bart going under the Bay scares me. What if something happened and the water just came rushing in and crushed/drowned us all? Going over any kind of bridge brings on some major anxiety. The longer the bridge the more anxiety I have. Being in tall buildings, amusement rides of any kind, being on boats, being in those underwater aquarium things, and the list goes on. I am pretty good at hiding my anxiety though, thank god. Or else everyone around me would think I was a total nut case. Ahahaha

You can read her full post here.

What kinds of things are you weird about now that you have children? Or have you just always been a weirdo like me?

10 things I say all the time!

As a mother I find myself repeating myself, all god damn day. I swear my kids refuse to listen to me on purpose. They must like to hear my voice or something. 🙂 Anyway, a while back I wrote Cash’s top 10 sayings I hear throughout the day so I figured, since I am constantly repeating myself I would write down my top 10 ten most repeated phrases. I’m sure some of these phrases will change as the boys grow and I can’t wait to see what life brings us.

  1. “I love you.”
  2. “Leave your brother alone!”
  3. “Cash/Tate, you need to share!.”
  4. “No.”
  5. “Come on, Cash. Hurry up, please.”
  6. “You are making mommy very frustrated.”
  7. “Cash/Tate, what is the problem here? Why are you fighting?”
  8. “What would you like to eat?”
  9. “If you do that again you are going to lose it for the day!”
  10. “Boys, keep your hands to yourself!”

As my boys get older and Tate starts hitting more I find myself wondering how bad it’s going to get before it stops. 😦 What are you constantly saying to your little ones (or your spouse)?

Self-Discovery Month

I learned May is also Self-Discovery Month so I wanted to look into this. I feel like this should really be a post written by our sweet friend Annie T. but I’m going to give it a shot. 🙂

To do this post I had to do a bit of research because I am not great in this area. Honestly, there are days when I have no fucking clue who I am or what the hellI should be doing. Yup, I’m one of those moms.

Anyway, one of the important first steps I found was to discover who YOU are. Who are you as an individual? What makes you tick? Where are you now and where would you like to be? What do you like about YOU and your life? What do you dislike about YOU and your life? What are your dreams or ambitions?

Step 2: Define what you want to change in your life. Be realistic and don’t try to change everything all at once. You can make small changes, as long as you start the process. You can still achieve what you want by making small changes along the way. And with each small change, you will become more and more confident. Don’t ever let fear hold you back; always remember, YOU CAN OVERCOME FEAR. Take a leap of faith and go for it!

Step 3: Make a plan and remind yourself daily what you want from life. Write down what you want to change about your life and put it in a place where you will see it every day. Let it be your reminder to keep moving forward with those small changes and sometimes even big changes. You can’t accomplish anything without a plan, at least I can’t!

Step 4: Try something new. Mix things up! Try something out of your comfort zone! Accepting new challenges builds self-confidence. And who doesn’t like having more confidence? And it’s okay if you fail, that’s another reason to get back up and try again. Try not to live life through what ifs, it will drag down you down.

Step 5: Believe in YOU and your ability. Once you have your plan, attack it! Go for it! Believe in yourself and the world is your oyster, or whatever the saying is.

If you aren’t one who likes lists and plans you can start by answering these questions. In my opinion, they do similar things. I may do another post later this month answering these questions myself. Depending on my school schedule. 😦

Who am I? 

What do I need right now more than anything else? 

What do I need from myself right now? 

How do I want to feel? 

Why do I want this? 

What might stop me from getting this? 

How do I define success? 

What do I see when I look in the mirror? 

What is the next best choice I can make? 

What are my core values? 

When I am struggling, what do I do? What do I tell myself? What do I tell others? 

What might make this situation even better? 

What are my regrets and mistakes? 

If I had all the self-confidence, time, talent and money to do anything I wanted to do, what would I want to achieve? 

What are my gifts? How can I share them with the world? 

How can I celebrate each day or the moments of my life? 

Disappearing Act

Hello everyone,

I don’t know when I will be posting again. I have some silly and generic posts already written but I’m not sure when I will be writing anything worthwhile. School right now is kicking my ass.

I am swimming in homework.

Tyson told me last night most people take 5 classes a semester and I’m just not sure how they do it. I have 4 classes with a 6 week class on top of that and I’m swamped. I just have to keep reminding myself, all of this will be worth it in the end.

I feel guilty if I’m not doing homework and working on this instead or if I’m reading something other than school books. So I may be MIA for a while. Thankfully this semester will be over in 5 weeks. Then it’s three weeks of freedom and then back to it for the summer semester. It’s going to be a busy summer but I am looking forward to getting that much closer to applying for UC Berkley. ❤

univerity life 2

university life