10 things I say all the time!

As a mother I find myself repeating myself, all god damn day. I swear my kids refuse to listen to me on purpose. They must like to hear my voice or something. 🙂 Anyway, a while back I wrote Cash’s top 10 sayings I hear throughout the day so I figured, since I am constantly repeating myself I would write down my top 10 ten most repeated phrases. I’m sure some of these phrases will change as the boys grow and I can’t wait to see what life brings us.

  1. “I love you.”
  2. “Leave your brother alone!”
  3. “Cash/Tate, you need to share!.”
  4. “No.”
  5. “Come on, Cash. Hurry up, please.”
  6. “You are making mommy very frustrated.”
  7. “Cash/Tate, what is the problem here? Why are you fighting?”
  8. “What would you like to eat?”
  9. “If you do that again you are going to lose it for the day!”
  10. “Boys, keep your hands to yourself!”

As my boys get older and Tate starts hitting more I find myself wondering how bad it’s going to get before it stops. 😦 What are you constantly saying to your little ones (or your spouse)?

Self-Discovery Month

I learned May is also Self-Discovery Month so I wanted to look into this. I feel like this should really be a post written by our sweet friend Annie T. but I’m going to give it a shot. 🙂

To do this post I had to do a bit of research because I am not great in this area. Honestly, there are days when I have no fucking clue who I am or what the hellI should be doing. Yup, I’m one of those moms.

Anyway, one of the important first steps I found was to discover who YOU are. Who are you as an individual? What makes you tick? Where are you now and where would you like to be? What do you like about YOU and your life? What do you dislike about YOU and your life? What are your dreams or ambitions?

Step 2: Define what you want to change in your life. Be realistic and don’t try to change everything all at once. You can make small changes, as long as you start the process. You can still achieve what you want by making small changes along the way. And with each small change, you will become more and more confident. Don’t ever let fear hold you back; always remember, YOU CAN OVERCOME FEAR. Take a leap of faith and go for it!

Step 3: Make a plan and remind yourself daily what you want from life. Write down what you want to change about your life and put it in a place where you will see it every day. Let it be your reminder to keep moving forward with those small changes and sometimes even big changes. You can’t accomplish anything without a plan, at least I can’t!

Step 4: Try something new. Mix things up! Try something out of your comfort zone! Accepting new challenges builds self-confidence. And who doesn’t like having more confidence? And it’s okay if you fail, that’s another reason to get back up and try again. Try not to live life through what ifs, it will drag down you down.

Step 5: Believe in YOU and your ability. Once you have your plan, attack it! Go for it! Believe in yourself and the world is your oyster, or whatever the saying is.

If you aren’t one who likes lists and plans you can start by answering these questions. In my opinion, they do similar things. I may do another post later this month answering these questions myself. Depending on my school schedule. 😦

Who am I? 

What do I need right now more than anything else? 

What do I need from myself right now? 

How do I want to feel? 

Why do I want this? 

What might stop me from getting this? 

How do I define success? 

What do I see when I look in the mirror? 

What is the next best choice I can make? 

What are my core values? 

When I am struggling, what do I do? What do I tell myself? What do I tell others? 

What might make this situation even better? 

What are my regrets and mistakes? 

If I had all the self-confidence, time, talent and money to do anything I wanted to do, what would I want to achieve? 

What are my gifts? How can I share them with the world? 

How can I celebrate each day or the moments of my life? 

Disappearing Act

Hello everyone,

I don’t know when I will be posting again. I have some silly and generic posts already written but I’m not sure when I will be writing anything worthwhile. School right now is kicking my ass.

I am swimming in homework.

Tyson told me last night most people take 5 classes a semester and I’m just not sure how they do it. I have 4 classes with a 6 week class on top of that and I’m swamped. I just have to keep reminding myself, all of this will be worth it in the end.

I feel guilty if I’m not doing homework and working on this instead or if I’m reading something other than school books. So I may be MIA for a while. Thankfully this semester will be over in 5 weeks. Then it’s three weeks of freedom and then back to it for the summer semester. It’s going to be a busy summer but I am looking forward to getting that much closer to applying for UC Berkley. ❤

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university life

Worst Chores EVER!

Chores suck. Everyone knows it. Anyone that likes cleaning is a weirdo. Plain and simple. But there are a few chores that I hate more than others.

  1. Laundry. This is going to sound bad but if it was just my laundry I wouldn’t mind. None of my clothes get folded so it’s quite easy for me to put my clothes away. And I don’t go through a ton of clothes every day so I could easily go two weeks before having to do laundry. My kids obviously go through more clothes than I would like and half of their clothes get folded up. My husband goes through an insane amount of clothing every day. On top of going through a bunch of clothes, he is very particular about how they are folded, which means I’ve given up on folding them. He doesn’t like the way I do it, so I don’t do it anymore.
  2. Cooking. I just don’t really like to cook. Thankfully Tyson enjoys it and is good at it! Ever since we started doing Blue Apron I have pretty much quit cooking. Tyson has never said he’s been annoyed or dislikes doing all the cooking and I couldn’t appreciate him more.
  3. Cleaning the bathroom.  I think this one is pretty self-explanatory. My husband and Cash are both very clean as far as boys go, but I still don’t enjoy doing it. My hair falls out like crazy so there’s hair all over the place (no just in the bathroom), the kids leave bath toys everywhere, we have a small apartment which means clutter, and bathrooms are just gross.
  4. Walking the dog. Tyson’s dog is his true love. I am not an animal person and I would much rather not have a pet but Tyson is the complete opposite. I don’t enjoy walking her at all. Especially when it’s cold, dark, or I can hear the turkeys anywhere near me. Ahahaha
  5. Bathing the kids. This really is just related to Tate. I hate bathing Tate. Cash is so easy in the tub or shower. Tate is still too young that he’s difficult to bathe and doesn’t listen. He tries to stand up when I wash him and will hit his head on the soap thing on the wall or he will slip and put his head in the water. Then he gets upset when it’s time to wash his hair because he doesn’t like getting water in his face but doesn’t understand the concept of tilting his head back. I can’t wait until he is just a little bit older and tubby time is a bit easier.

Toddlers and Bad Dreams

Last night was a rough one in the Marsh household. Cash woke up around 2 AM and had locked himself in his room so he couldn’t open his bedroom door. He had turned off the sound machine and turned on the lights. So of course, Tate woke up. Tyson tried to go into their room, calm Tate down, and get him back to sleep while I took Cash in our room and talked to him. He kept saying he wanted to sleep in our room, and this has been happening a lot recently. (Honestly, I would be fine with him sleeping in our bed every once in a while but the hubby is not.) He didn’t say he had nightmares until I asked if he had a bad dream that woke him up. Then he said yes, he had a bad dream but couldn’t tell me what it was about.

Tate didn’t go back to sleep, which upset Tyson. He grabbed Cash and put him back in his bed where he cried himself to sleep. I took Tate and tried to get him to sleep with me. He would fall asleep and then jolt awake because he heard something or slipped off my chest. Tyson tried getting him to settle down out on the couch and got Tate to sleep for maybe an hour or so.

Cash slept for maybe two hours before everyone had to get up to take Tyson to the train. Needless to say, our kids were quite cranky toady and we were all exhausted.

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(This video happened because Tate is wanting to be independent and walk down cement steps by himself, which he can’t do. I wouldn’t let him kill himself so he lost it and threw a huge fit. Cash started crying because his brother was so sad. My freaking kids man!)

The purpose of this post is to see if anyone else has gone through this. Does anyone have any tips? He didn’t say he was scared of monsters or something else in his dreams. I mention this because I had a friend make “monster spray” and it helped her son. I briefly searched Pinterest in the wee hours of the morning and quickly gave up.

monster spray

He already has “magic blankie” which is one of Tyson’s old Georgia blankets. Magic blankie has worked for over a year and we take it whenever we go on vacation. He still wants/needs it to sleep along with his mickey mouse doll. He’s really into superheroes and Darth Vader (he doesn’t quite understand that he’s a bad guy). So I’m trying to find some good ideas that might incorporate superheroes or star wars.

Tonight when we told him it was bedtime he started crying saying he was going to have bad dreams in his room. I asked him what was in his bad dreams and he told me it was dinosaurs, which is odd because he talks about dinosaurs all the time. He’s learning the names of them and seems to really like them. We are pretty strict about what he watches on TV so it’s not like he’s watching Jurrasic Park or anything. He is mostly watching shows like Mickey Mouse (really anything on Disney Jr.), Pokemon, or Transformers.

Anyway, I told Cash that daddy would go do a dinosaur check and look around his room and under his bed before he went in to go to sleep. Fingers crossed this helps and we get a full night of sleep tonight.

I need a stiff vodka tonic and any tips or tricks you have up your sleeves!

Before Having Kids

What was your life like before having kids?

Was it something you are proud of? Did you travel? Did you go to school? Did you invest time in your career? Did you take time for yourself? Did you learn about yourself? What did you do with all that extra time?

The reason I am writing this is because I have learned a few things over the past 3 1/2 years that I never would have learned without having kids. While you need to be selfless for your children you also need to take time for yourself and do things for yourself to stay sane as a parent. I had Cash at 23 and did not go to school before that. All of which means I did not invest in my career, travel, or learn very much about myself.

Before I was a parent I was a very selfish person and unfortunately that carried into parenthood. It didn’t change just because I got pregnant and had a gorgeous little baby. I was still very selfish and had a hard time adjusting to parent life. Once I realized that my son needed me to be at my very best and become selfless, things got a bit easier. It has been a work in progress but I feel like I continue to get better at it all the time. However, it’s only been over the past year that I’ve learned I need to take some me time to do things I want and need to do.

I’ve learned how to enjoy alone time. Before I would have hated walking around town by myself (without talking on the phone), sitting outside and relaxing alone, etc. My husband has been a great example of living a life outside of your kids and partner. Now I love the moments when I can simply sit in the sunshine and relax without any of my boys. I look forward to sitting down and doing homework even because I know it means I am getting some alone time.

Tyson always puts our family first but also needs his alone time and time with friends; without us. I had a hard time understanding this at first, but it was most likely because I didn’t have any friends in the city and I hated being alone. I feel so fortunate that he gives me the time I need to go do things with friends and spend some alone time to do whatever I want or need to do.

I adore our children and would never change my life as a mother, but I sure do love my “me” time and our date nights. I do, however, look forward to the times when they are older and Tyson and I can enjoy more alone time and travel more, but until then I will enjoy my random nights away and alone time.

Shout out to all the mamas and daddy’s being selfless and still taking care of yourself; it’s hard work!

Most influential dead people

I previously posted about the 10 people I thought were the most influential alive today (you can read that here) and decided I needed to make another list of influential people who have passed away. Again, these are in no particular order.

  • Mother Teresa
  • Martin Luther King Jr
  • Coretta Scott King
  • Walt Disney
  • Steve Jobs
  • Malcolm X
  • Sitting Bull
  • Alice Paul
  • Rosa Parks
  • Elizabeth Cady Stanton
  • Elie Wiesel
  • Frederick Douglass
  • Francis Willard
  • Jane Addams
  • Mohandas Gandhi
  • Lucy Burns
  • Fannie Lou Hamer
  • Betty Friedan
  • Muhammad Ali
  • Margaret Sanger
  • Elenore Roosevelt
  • Susan B Anthony