Signs You’re A Dad

To go along with my mom post for Mother’s Day, here’s one for the fellas. 🙂

I know I’m not a dad, but I live with one so I think I can spot the signs of a total dad. 🙂

  1. Dad jokes. Tyson might possibly be the best with the dad jokes; he is in a close competition with his own dad. Sadly though, Tyson had those dad jokes long before Cash and I came along.
  2. You are able to fall asleep anywhere with anything going on.
  3. This one piggybacks number 2; you can sleep through the baby crying.
  4. You’ve become the master of the white lie. I think this one just comes with having children. Telling them something broke or is out of batteries when really you took the damn batteries out so you didn’t have to hear it for another second!
  5. Again, all parents can relate to this one, but you’re definitely a dad when you’ve been covered in vomit that wasn’t yours. Just ask Tyson about our flight home from Atlanta when Cash was 1.5 years old. 😂
  6. Your balls are indestructible, or at least a little tougher than they used to be. I don’t know how many times one of the boys has hit, kicked, kneed, or elbowed Tyson in that area.
  7. You get very confident with your, um, package. Especially if you have boys because they will comment on it or try and grab it, all the time!
  8. You find “Daddy and Me” things very special and a must! Cash and Tyson (and sometimes Tate) have matching socks, matching shirts, and they have “Secret Boys Club” dates. All three of them love these little occasions that don’t involve mom. And trust me, I love them too! 
  9. You have or have had “Mickey Mouse Sex.” I heard this the other day on Chelsea Handler’s show and I laughed so hard because it’s so true. Her guest was talking about how he can turn on Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and know he has a good 15 minutes of alone time with his wife. Any parent of toddlers will agree with me and laugh because they’ve done the same thing!
  10. You work hard for your family. You will work long hours and multiple jobs if need be, then come home and play with the kiddos and help with dinner and bedtime routines. 

Thank you to my own father, husband, and father-in-law for being such great and amazing fathers and examples to my boys. And thank you to all the other dads out there being active in your children’s lives. You are all heroes in my eyes. ❤️

May

There are so many things going on in the month of May. We have Cinco de Mayo on the 5th, The Kentucky Derby on the 6th, Mother’s Day on the 14th, my father’s birthday, my father-in-law’s birthday, my parent’s anniversary, Bottle Rock, finals, and my parents coming to visit. It’s going to be a busy month for us.

Other than all of those events May is Mental Health Awareness Month, National Military Appreciation Month, and National Maternal Depression Awareness Month. All of these things are close to my heart.

Obviously, the Military Appreciation is close to my heart because my brother, cousins, uncles, and grandfathers have all served or are serving.

Mental Health Awareness Month and Maternal Depression Awareness Month go hand in hand for me. I have struggled with anxiety and depression since I was a teenager but it got significantly worse after having both my children.

My struggles with mental illness are what pushes me to go to school and do well in school. You can read all about my struggles here; if you haven’t already.

Little things like declaring May the National Maternal Depression Awareness Month is a small step to a bigger dream. I ultimately want every pregnant woman and her spouse to learn about postpartum depression and anxiety. I want it to be something people aren’t afraid to talk about. Something women can openly talk about without being embarrassed or being ridiculed. The theme for this year is ‘Speak Up When You’re Down.’ I absolutely love the theme. It’s hard to speak up, but it saves lives.

I know it saved mine.  

So, if anyone needs someone to talk to, vent to, unload to, or really anything else I have a free ear and would love to listen to you. ❤

Also, I want to make a little side note that taking medication does not make you weak. I had reservations when I first started seeing my psychiatrist but it has made a world of difference in my life. I don’t want to think about where I might be if I hadn’t been open and taken the medications.

National Sibling Day

It’s National Sibling Day today!

So this post is for my little brother, Skylar. You are my bubba, chunk-a-lovin, baby-girl, LB, and favorite brother! I wish we could spend some time together today, or anytime in the near future but I know we are both busy with work, school, and our cute kids. But I hope we can plan a trip home or to visit each other soon.

I know we haven’t always seen eye to eye and I’ve been a bitch to you more times than I would like to admit, but I hope you know I love you and I’m so proud of the man you are becoming. ❤

 

P.S. Sorry for the photo overload, but I love every single one of these!

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Safely Ever After – Internet

Part four of the Safely Ever After posts. This particular post is focused on being safe on the internet. This is an issue that is “new” to the world of parenting. My parents probably should have worried and talked to me about internet safety but thankfully I was a pretty good kid that didn’t get into any trouble, however, anyone much older than me didn’t have to worry about it because it has recently just become common for people to have such easy access to the internet.

The opening for this page states “You wouldn’t leave the front door of your home wide open when your children are alone… You wouldn’t allow a stranger in your child’s room and let them carry on a personal, intimate conversation…” and it couldn’t be truer. For some reason, this just really hits home for me and made me realize how dangerous the internet can be for children.

This is something that has really worried me but I know Tyson and I have some time to figure out our rules and guidelines regarding this issue. Some of these tips seem a little outdated, or maybe I am outdated. It just seems that some of these tips really pertain to chat rooms and I don’t know if those are very popular anymore. Maybe I’m just out of the loop and they are still popular. Anyway, these tips are a great start!

Here are Pattie Fitzgerald’s internet safety tips for parents:

  1. Keep the computer your children use in a central, visible location such as the living room or family room – within your sight, NOT in their bedroom.
  2. Talk frankly with your kids about what can be unsafe ONLINE. Explain that they wouldn’t engage in personal conversations with people they don’t know in “the real world”, and the same rule applies while using the Internet.
  3. Set reasonable limits for how much time children can spend online and limit the websites they are allowed to access.
  4. Use your Internet Service Provider’s parent controls and take advantage of the widely accessible content filters, pop-up blockers, and monitoring resources and software available to parents.
  5. Learn which websites your children frequent and which websites are popular among kids and teens. Get familiar with IM/text slang: POS – Parent over shoulder, P911 – parent alert, LOL – laughing out loud, BBL – be back later, CUOL—see you online, GFN – gone for now, A/S/L – age, sex, location, CTY – see you tomorrow, F2F – face to face, LMIRL – let’s meet in real life, WTGP – want to go private? (just to name a few!)
  6. Talk to children about what personal information is and why you should never give it to people online. It’s more than just name, address, or phone number!
  7. Internet accounts should be in the parent’s name with parents having the primary screen name, controlling passwords, and using blocking and/or filtering devices.
  8. Explain to children that people aren’t always who they say they are online. Remind them not to believe everything they read. Be sure to tell your kids they should never carry on sexual discussions online with anyone, especially people they don’t know.
  9. Find out where your child has Internet access… schools, libraries, community centers, friends’ homes. Whenever possible, ask what kind of safety measurements are in place to protect children.
  10. Check your Internet browser’s history regularly to be sure there are no dangerous or inappropriate sites being visited.
  11. The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC) has a system for identifying AND reporting online predators and child pornographers and contributing to law-enforcement investigations. Report anything questionable too: www.cybertipline.com.
  12. To learn more about internet safety for you and your family, visit these educational sites:
    www.wiredsafety.org
    www.connectsafely.org
    www.cybertipline.com
    www.webwisekids.org
    www.netsmartz.org
    www.kidsbesafeonline.com

There are some specific tips for kids regarding the internet.

  1. I am Special and I have the RIGHT to be SAFE ONLINE!
  2. I will not give out any PERSONAL INFORMATION ONLINE such as my name, address or phone number, my school, the area I live in, sports teams I belong to, or places I often hang out at with my friends.
  3. I will tell my parents right away if anyone online sends me a message that makes me feel scared, uncomfortable or seems “weird”, EVEN if it’s from someone I know.
  4. I will NEVER AGREE TO MEET anyone in person that I’ve only talked to online. I will check with my parents and if they say it’s okay, then one of them will come with me.
  5. I will NEVER SEND my picture to anyone online without telling my parents first.
  6. Sometimes people aren’t always who they say they are online… I will always tell my parents immediately if someone I don’t know emails me, I.M.’s me, or contacts me online in any way.
  7. I will not give out my Internet Password to anyone except my parents. *Not even to my best friends!
  8. I WILL NOT DOWNLOAD ANYTHING without checking with my parents first.
  9. I will not open emails or attachments from people I don’t know.
  10. I WILL ABIDE BY THE INTERNET AND COMPUTER RULES that my parents have set up for me; such as how much time I can spend on the computer and which websites or chat rooms I am allowed to access.
  11. The Internet can offer many fun and helpful resources for kids and I agree to conduct myself in a safe and appropriate manner online at all times. I will follow all NETIQUETTE RULES and be smart, safe cyber citizen.
    www.webwisekids.org
    www.iKeepSafe.org
    www.netsmartz.org
    www.kidsbesafeonline.com

 

Stop Caring!

***Warning***Foul Language Ahead***Warning***

Ahahaha This is mostly for my own amusement, and for my parents so they don’t have to read my sassy mouth if they don’t want to. 😉

As I was scrolling through FB today I saw this great article that I had to share with everyone. The article is all about not caring anymore. It’s about giving up some stress in your life to try and make the world, and your life, much better and happier. It’s great because I struggle with a lot of these issues and need reminders to stop caring so much.

  1. Giving a fuck about what others think
    This has been such a hard thing for me. I’ve come a long way since moving to California and having the support of my husband. Now all I really care about is his opinion but there are times when those insecurities creep up and bug me. It’s a work in progress.
  2. Giving a fuck about being right all the time
    This one is hard for me. Hard enough that I have passed this trait on to my oldest son. I have been doing a pretty damn good job of giving in more and accepting fault, but it’s taken a long time and a lot of arguments. 😦
  3. Giving a fuck about having a perfect body
    This has not gone away. Not even close. I mean obviously.
  4. Giving a fuck about the 3-inch heels
    I’m on the fence about this one. I love wearing my heels when I get the chance, even if they aren’t the most comfortable shoes in the world. But I like the feelings they give me. When I wear heels I feel more confident and I like being eye level with my husband, or at least closer to eye level. 🙂
  5. Giving a fuck about past mistakes
    YES!!!! Quit living in the past! Move on! The future is so much brighter!
  6. Giving a fuck about gossip
    Not having a lot of friends has helped with the gossip issue. I may not have a lot of friends but the ones I have truly care about me.
  7. Giving a fuck about others’ approval or validation
    This goes along with caring what others think. Believe in yourself damn it!!
  8. Giving a fuck about letting go the toxic
    This one is huge. Why should you keep toxic people in your life? Leave them in the past and forget about them! If they are no good for you, fuck ’em.
  9. Giving a fuck about failure
    I have not mastered this one at all. I care, a lot about failing. I worry about getting good grades in school. I worry about being a good mother. I worry about being a good wife. I worry about being a good friend. I worry about failing the people I love. I need to work on this one.
  10. Giving a fuck about having plans on a Friday night
    This one disappears when you have children, or at least it did for me. It’s exciting when you get to have Friday nights out but having a night in with great food and a bottle of wine is just as exciting. 🙂
  11. Giving a fuck about getting tons of likes on Facebook or Instagram
    Yeah, I hate this one. I briefly talked about this in a post about millennials.  Our culture thrives on social media attention and it’s sad. Since watching that talk (in the previous post) I have been making a conscious effort to be on my phone less and care less about the responses I get. Before I would check how many likes I had gotten and who had liked it. I honestly don’t remember the last time I did this. I have moved on from giving a shit about who likes my pictures or posts.
  12. Giving a fuck about what you don’t have
    I think every single person deals with this at some point in their life.
  13. Giving a fuck about revenge
    I don’t believe in karma, which makes revenge a hard thing for me to let go of.  I don’t believe in fate or what comes around goes around. I have gotten better as letting go of things as I have gotten better with moving on from the past, though.
  14. Giving a fuck about “What Ifs”
    You will go insane thinking about all the “what ifs” that may or may not happen. Try and live in the moment. this one, just like a bunch of the others, it is easier said than done.
  15. Giving a fuck about material possessions
    Try and be happy with what you have. Enjoy your family and friends. Think about money and your possessions less.
  16. Giving a fuck about regrets
    It’s only human to have regrets, but no one is perfect. No one has the perfect past and has always made the right decision.
  17. Giving a fuck about being good enough
    What does this even mean? Who is good enough? What does it mean to be good enough? Who decides what is good enough? FUCK IT AND FUCK THEM!

 

You should definitely go read the full article: 17 Fucks You Should Stop Giving – For all Women

Chrissy Teigen

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If you haven’t heard already Chrissy Teigen opened up in Glamour Magazine about her postpartum depression. I think this is absolutely incredible. I never disliked her but I’ve also never told someone, “Oh, Chrissy Teigen, I absolutely love her!”

That all changed today, though.

I admire her.

I can’t even imagine the strength it took to write that open letter and reveal it to the world on such a level. She truly is an incredibly strong woman.

This is just one step closer to what I want to happen. If you are new to my blog you can read about my struggles and dreams if you would like, but the short version is I want the world to open up about the struggles of motherhood and the struggles of postpartum. I want postpartum depression and anxiety to be talked about with every single pregnant woman.

Having celebrities be open and honest helps make the rest of the world these problems as “okay” or “normal;” whatever that means.

So, thank you, Chrissy Teigen.

Thank you for sharing your story.

Thank you for being so strong.

Thank you for being so honest and raw.

And a huge thank you to Glamour Magazine for putting this in your magazine.

You can read her full essay here.

A Few Of My Favorite Things

“Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
Silver-white winters that melt into springs
These are a few of my favorite things
When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I’m feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don’t feel so bad”
  • Bubble baths
  • Good books
  • Seeing my children happy
  • Listening to my husband laugh his ‘girly, high pitched laugh’ (which means he thinks something is absolutely hilarious.)
  • Playing board games
  • Finding a parking spot on campus
  • Funny podcasts
  • Getting a massage
  • Tattoos
  • Champagne
  • Drinking games
  • When my hair is clean and soft
  • Getting my hair played with
  • White teeth
  • My Uggs
  • Musicals
  • White Chocolate
  • Fun music to rock out to
  • Watching my husband succeed
  • Clean sheets and freshly shaved legs
  • Car rides and sing-alongs with my husband
  • Date night
  • Late night talks with family or friends
  • Snuggling
  • Getting good grades
  • Pecan Pie
  • Steak and brussels sprouts
  • Sleeping in
  • A good movie