Support. Who Gives it and Who Expects it?

I have had a few discussions in my psychology class about support in relationships. It’s been interesting to hear who gives support and who expects it. Along with these discussions we have been researching the topic and everything I’m finding is extremely interesting to me.

According to psychologists, women and girls are taught to do “work of relationships” and support male concerns. Whereas men and boys are taught to expect support from females but not to provide it. What I’m wondering is, how true is this?

People in relationships usually see their partner as their support, their go-to person, and the person they can always lean on. If this relationship is two men or two women do the expected gender roles change? If this relationship is a man and a woman is it possible for the expected gender roles to change or become more equal?

I understand women are raised to be more supportive and more comfortable giving and receiving support, especially emotional support. I also understand that women generally value support more. Whereas men generally value support less and talk about their feelings less.

In my opinion; these general observations and the way we raise children in this society is giving us some serious problems. It’s leaving us with men who are incapable of emotion or seen as [place negative word regarding females here]. It’s leaving us with women who are not allowed to be serious and business-minded because they are seen as “too emotional.” As a mother, I am determined to raise my boys into adults who can express their feelings and don’t look down on men or women who may be emotional or express their emotions.

How do you feel about the support men and women are expected to give/receive and how we as a society view emotion?

Much Love,
Ashley

 

2 Comments

  1. Benjamin Woolridge

    To me, gender roles remain strictly defined in our patriarchal society and the expectations of women remain the same as the nurturers, caregivers, etc…while men are still seen as the breadwinners and heads of households. Though women have made some inroads as far as equality is concerned, they are still, by and large, a muted group, black women even more so. Hopefully, this will change in the near future.

    Like

    1. avodkakindofmom

      I completely agree. Our society makes it nearly impossible to escape these gender roles, especially for women of color. I truly believe the more women and men fight against this dichotomy of gender the further away from it we will get. I have high hopes in my generation (the millennials) to make some serious progress.

      Liked by 1 person

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