November is National Adoption Awareness Month!
This obviously has a special place in my heart because of our sweet little Cash Man and my sweet and loving husband. Every adoption comes with its struggles and triumphs, ours was no different. At the end of the day, I am so happy and relieved that we are finally a legal family and there’s nothing we have to worry about. Cash could not have a better dad than who he has in Tyson; Tate too.
What I love most is Tyson didn’t have to love Cash. He never had to take him on as his own and love him as fiercely as he does, yet he did it. He did it without me asking and without complaints. I will never be able to thank my husband enough for everything he does, not only for Cash but, for all of us.
Now I’m getting all sentimental and off subject, sorry about that. Anyway, if you are interested in reading about our story from my point of view, you can read it here. I asked Tyson to write a little something for this post and I was tearing up reading it. Thank you, Tyson. ❤
Happy National Adoption Month!
As you know, if you’re regular readers of this blog, I’m not our oldest son’s biological dad. Adoption has had a profound impact on my life and my family, so I’m happy to share some of my thoughts to kick off this month-long celebration of such a powerful, important, and necessary process.
During our adoption hearing, the judge asked me to describe my relationship with Cash. My answer was very, very, very brief. I cannot, under any circumstance, speak once I start to cry. I think I’m physically incapable of it. I simply can’t push any words out. Though I was prepped beforehand that he would ask, in that moment the emotion hit hard and my vocal chords went into lockdown mode.
A year and a half later, I’ll use this space to finally give a little glimpse into my relationship with my son.
I fell head over heels for Cash from the moment I met him. For anyone that knows him, that’s easy to believe. He’s a character and has the sweetest heart of anyone I know. His deep genuine love and concern for every single person he meets is remarkable. Helping to foster that in him challenges me and has helped me to become more compassionate too. Whether I’m watching him cry because his favorite cartoon character is sad, or I’m watching him hug and comfort his little brother, I’m always so proud of his capacity to empathize with and love others. I could probably describe our relationship best by simply saying I’m amazed at how amazing this little guy is, in spite of me.
Cash and I laugh together…a lot. Cash loves to smile and laugh. Lucky for him, I’ve been developing a profound repertoire of “dad jokes” since a very young age. It’s important to me that he knows it’s okay to be goofy and cheerful. Some of my favorite memories with my family are times we just sat around laughing hysterically. I want him to be able to say the same thing.
Cash looks up to me, which I love. I always wanted to be just like my dad. Occasionally, other members of my family refer to me as “junior” because of how similar I am to my dad. I always take it as the biggest compliment. I can see a lot of the same in Cash, which terrifies, challenges, and motivates me every second of every day. Occasionally, I’ll catch Cash trying to imitate something about me – the way I stand, things I say, the way I dress. Every time, my heart beats out of my chest.
We love to go out together for “Daddy/Cash time”. This can be something as simple as getting donuts together or something bigger like an overnight at a hotel, either way I love to make it all about Cash and make sure he has opportunities to have my undivided attention. I love having his attention too.
“Being Cash’s dad is the best….it’s just the best.” Through tears and a huge lump in my throat, that’s all I was able to push out when the judge asked me to describe our relationship. It might be the most honest and accurate sentence I’ve ever spoken.
“It’s not flesh and blood, but heart which makes us fathers and sons.”
Do you have an adoption story to share? I would love to hear it. Let’s spread some love and positivity around. ❤
Ashley & Tyson