Girl’s Girl

Girl’s Girl

I’ve been contemplating these terms of “girl’s girl” and “man’s man.” What do they really mean when you get down to it? Is it wrong to not be a “girl’s girl” or a “man’s man?” Should we want to fall into these categories? Will we have more friends if we do? Are they just another skewed stereotype that only fits a small percentage of people?

For this blog, I’m just going to focus on being a “girls girl” since it would be the stereotype or group I should/would fall into. Let me start this by stating I have always wanted to be a “girl’s girl.” I have always wanted to have a lot of girlfriends and be the type of girl other girls want to hang out with. I have never been that type of girl though and I never really knew why. I always only had one or two girlfriends and the rest were males. I have always had more fun with males than females. I have always connected better with males than females. I have always trusted males more than females.

For a while there I thought I was making some good progress with the friends I’ve made at the gym the past few months. They were all fellow moms, which is always helpful when looking for other female friends. But sometimes it just doesn’t click like I thought it would. However, I realize it will take time to build up those friendships. And it’s not always reciprocated, and if that’s the case, it’s okay.

What is wrong with me? Why can’t I just get into the girl talk? Why can’t I be a “girl’s girl?” Why can’t I have a ‘tribe’?

I decided to do a little internet digging into what makes you a “girl’s girl” and everything I found was very cliche and, honestly, obnoxious. All those stereotypical girl things I don’t like about having those stereotypical girlfriends were all the reasons there are “girl’s girls,” or signs of a “girl’s girl.”

Maybe I am just stuck being more of a “guy’s girl,” but maybe it’s not such a bad thing. Maybe that’s why my husband likes me? (Doubt it, but it’s worth a shot. ahaha) Maybe it’s what makes me so outgoing and fun? Maybe it’s what makes me approachable? Or maybe it’s preparing me for having teenage sons and grown sons of my own. Or maybe, just maybe, there is nothing wrong with not being a “girl’s girl” and those stereotypes suck anyway.

Yeah, I like that last option. 🙂

So, here’s to all my “guy’s girls:”

Don’t let anyone make you feel bad because you would rather be one of the guys.
Don’t let anyone criticize you for not having a traditional ‘tribe.’
Don’t let anyone say you are threatened by females because you aren’t. You just have different interests and that’s okay!
Girl, don’t ever change!
And last, but not least, fill your ‘tribe’ up with the best dudes you’ve got!

He Has What?!?!

Hand Foot and Mouth.

That’s right ladies and gentlemen, it has hit our household. I didn’t think it would ever happen. We had two instances where our boys were playing with kids who a day or two later had the infamous bumps and came out unscathed.

Not this time. Our little Tater Tot has hand foot and mouth disease. It sucks! I had actually never heard of this until we started going to Renaissance Club Sport and putting the kids into Kids World. He had a fever on Friday night and we noticed the bumps on Sunday so I am hoping we are on the downhill now that it’s Tuesday. Poor little guy is having a hard time sleeping and he’s just generally a cranky kid. If you’ve never heard of it, you should look it up. It’s not a fun thing to have and there’s nothing you can do for them. You can give them Tylenol and cold foods/liquids to help with the pain but that’s about it. I did learn last night that Tate likes his feet being rubbed; I don’t know if it helps with the pain or if they are itchy but I rubbed his poor little feet for the better part of last night.

I obviously can’t take him to Kids World because it is so contagious. Which means I need to get creative on when and how to do homework. I did decide to drop my astronomy class so I have roughly 3 hours in the morning when Janai is at the house before my psych class. Which means I come to school at 7 and do homework before going to class, go home, and try and entertain the boys at home for 7 hours. 😦 It’s only Tuesday, I have a test in psych, and I’m over the week. ahaha I am really enjoying my psych class though. It’s mostly open class discussions or small group discussions about things I find really interesting.

I am really enjoying my psych class though. It’s mostly open class discussions or small group discussions about things I find really interesting. Yesterday we talked about equality and females being second class citizens, which I obviously found really interesting. The only thing I would change about the class is the people in it. There are roughly 30 people in the class and the same 7-10 people contribute to our discussions every day. I would love to hear what everyone else thinks on these topics. Today is only our 6th class so hopefully, as this week comes to a close more people will open up and contribute.

On the plus side, next week is the 4th of July! Which is (usually) my favorite holiday. The Bay Area has got me a little jaded when it comes to the 4th. Since moving here I have not had a great 4th of July. I want that small town feel; fireworks, community, friends, fun, warm weather, and country music. I tried getting the country music in this weekend but it didn’t really work out. I’m hoping we can at least see fireworks this year. It would make me one happy girl! If not, I expect all of you to post videos on FB or here so I can watch live vicariously through you, and be jealous! 🙂

Tough Decisions

Tough Decisions

I am stuck between a rock and a hard place right now.

I have had a week of summer semester and I am contemplating dropping my astronomy class. I don’t have faith in myself; I don’t think I’m going to do well. And by well I mean I want an A. This professor let us know on average he only has 1 or 2 students get an A every semester, and he’s been teaching this class for 25 years (maybe 26, I can’t remember for sure). Anyway, I have been studying every day, which he said is the way to learn all the information in his class; not to mention the other 2 classes I have to study and do assignments for. And of course, since it’s summer semester it’s a full semester jammed into 6 weeks. SO the test I have on Wednesday for my astronomy class wouldn’t normally be happening until week 4 (in a normal semester). 😦

Like I said in my last post I have three tests next week for my three different classes that just started this Monday. Anyway, the reason I’m stressing is that I’m considering dropping the astronomy class. Is it worth risking the bad grade?

Is it worth risking the bad grade?

Is it worth dropping the class, trying to get into another physical science in the next two semesters so I can still transfer to Berkley next fall?

Is it worth the stress it’s causing me?

God damn it. I have had anxiety all week and it’s been so long since I had any anxiety at all! I am not enjoying it. 😦

I tried to make an appointment and talk to a counselor just a few minutes ago and the website said they were not making any appointments. I don’t know if that means they only take walk-ins during the summer, I don’t know if that means they don’t see anyone during the summer… I have no idea. I want to talk to someone and plan out my path to make sure I get everything I need and take all my required classes to get into Berkley. 😦

Ugh. Why is college so hard????

Please, someone, tell me it’s all worth it. I need the reminder today, desperately.

Summer Semester Week 1

Week one is officially over! I have survived a week of 7:30 AM classes and an extremely obnoxious pair of men/boys in my psych class that take their shoes off (in the middle of summer), don’t listen, don’t pay attention, talk out of turn, and talk about things that don’t have anything to do with what we are talking about. It is so annoying to me. If it was any other class I probably wouldn’t care, but I am really interested in this class and it’s the field I want to go into. I want to take in everything this professor has to teach me/us.

But oh, my god, those two boys/men drive me freaking crazy! Literally, one of them reads comic books or plays on this handheld video game the whole time we are in class and brings up things that are completely irrelevant to whatever we are talking about in class. He delays class constantly and does not even try to pay attention. Plus, his feet stink so bad! UGH! It really drives me crazy. He gets up 4 or 5 times before and after our break (in a 2-hour class). Honestly, it just drives me nuts. I am trying so hard to be understanding and accepting because those are traits I think are important and they are traits I really want to work on, but OH MY GOD!  It’s so hard sometimes!

The second boy/man is very loud, assertive, and friends with the man/boy above, which means they build on each other if our professor does not interrupt. Being loud and assertive is usually a good quality, but in this case, he talks out of turn, talks over our professor, talks over other students, he talks over everyone in that room and most of the time he has no idea what he’s talking about or he’s blatantly wrong. It’s so frustrating every single time he opens his mouth because he’s either wrong or his story is going nowhere.

Every time these boys/men talk our professor has to cut them off, politely of course, and redirect the conversation to whatever he was talking about before they interrupted.

Anyway, I think I’ve gotten off topic. I have my first week of summer semester under my belt, only 5 more to go!!! Unfortunately, next week is going to suck so bad! I have a test for my Psychology class on Tuesday, a test for my Astrology class on Wednesday, and a test for my Anthropology class on Thursday. 😦 I’m freaking out a little bit. I studied for about 3 1/2 hours today and feel like I didn’t make any progress. 😦 There’s just so much information to memorize. 😦

Alright, I’m done bitching. I’m sorry about that little pity party I just had there. Anyway, I’m hoping I can really get this stuff into my brain this weekend. 😦

Weird Mom Issues

Weird Mom Issues

Hello, everyone!

I came across an interesting article that was talking about the 7 things she’s weird about now that she has children. I can relate to some of them, some of them I don’t care about, and some of them I am also weird about but for very different reasons. Now she’s not talking about watching a TV show that has a child being hurt and crying over it, I think that’s completely normal and no one thinks you’re a weirdo for crying. Literally, every mom has done it. And if you say you haven’t, well you’re a fucking liar. Sorry, but you are. She’s talking about things you would never think would worry you or make you think twice but now that you have a small human life completely depending on you to keep it alive shit has changed. Life just got really fucking complicated and hard all of a sudden. Welcome to parenthood!

Welcome to parenthood!

Number 1 on her list is baked goods. She explains that she used to love any kind of baked goods and would never turn them down given the opportunity. However, now that she has had children and has had the pleasure of having “helping hands” in the kitchen she will not eat any baked goods at bake sales, church, etc. Kids are gross. Plain and simple. They don’t have any concept of germs or proper cooking etiquette. Their spit, dirty fingers, and boogers get all up in whatever it is you’re cooking. I understand why she would be weird about it, but I’m going to be completely honest, I don’t care. I ate that shit before and I’m not dead. I’ll eat it now. I will add to this confession though, my kids boogers, spit, and dirty fingers/toes don’t gross me out and the same goes for our friends’ kids. My husband, on the other hand, is not a fan at all!

Number 2 on her list is being home alone at night. She’s very protective now that she’s a mother. Every little noise and creak brings out her inner mama bear, and honestly who can blame her. I get scared very easily when I’m home alone but this is nothing new. It was happening long before I had children. I am a big fan of murder shows like Snapped, Dateline, I Almost Got Away With It, Criminal Minds, etc. I also love watching anything about serial killers; documentaries, movies, true crime tv, you name it I will enjoy it. I have had psychologists tell me I need to stop watching shows like this because it is making my anxiety worse than it already is, and they are probably right. But I like these types of shows, they make me happy …. at the time. However, a few weeks later when I’m home alone or home with the kids (yes, even in the middle of the day) and I hear a weird noise I punch in the numbers for 911 and have my finger ready to hit the dial button. But I will say now that I have had children, especially if they are home with me, the panic is much worse. My mind goes to the absolute worst thing and I have a little panic attack before I can talk myself into sanity.

Number 3 on her list is flying. I completely relate to this one. She describes my usual flight with my children. The kids are happy on their various electronics or with their toys while I am thinking of every possible outcome if something were to go wrong. Every little bit of turbulence (and there’s a lot of that flying out of Utah) makes my mind go to the worst place possible. The worst part for me is take off and landing. I’m not sure why but I think it’s probably because that is the loudest and most jerky part of the flight. We are usually flying out of Oakland so we are flying out over the water and I imagine the plane nose diving into the Bay. EVERY FUCKING TIME. I think about what I would do if something were to happen, how would I save both the boys, how would I save myself, etc. It’s exhausting. The author of this post also made a comment about missing in-flight cocktails and I’m here to say fuck that. Get the cocktail. Hell, get two or three. You’re flying with children, you deserve/need it. A fun tip I’ve learned is that Southwest flight attendants are amazing! They will help entertain your kids and give you free cocktails when they can see you’re struggling. I am so thankful for those men and women!

Number 4 on her list is convenience stores and banks. After reading this one I thought to myself that she may need to go talk to someone. She sounds like a nervous wreck! She gets worried about going into a bank and what would happen if it got robbed. She wouldn’t be able to keep your infant quite… Umm… No, that’s not what I’m thinking about when I have to go anywhere in public with my kids. What I’m thinking is “GOD! This double stroller is a joke. Is it even going to fit through the door? Can I get some help here?” “Please stop asking for things. I just want to get bread and get out of here!” “Please stop touching things!” Ugh, the list goes on and on! I don’t every worry about someone hurting myself or my children while at a store or bank, which is shocking for me. I simply don’t want the struggle and stress of taking a 4-year-old and an 18-month-old in and out of their car seats to go anywhere.

Number 5 on her list is waterskiing and contact sports. After reading this I am positive this woman is a basket case. She prefers to avoid sports that could permanently injure her because then there would be no one to take care of her children. I have no second thoughts about that. My issue is that I can’t go underwater without plugging my nose. (Yeah, I know. It’s very childish and ridiculous. But it freaks me out and gives me anxiety for some reason) Which means any sort of water sport is out for me. I used to play touch football with the boys before I had Cash. After I had Cash someone had to watch the baby and it was always me, which meant I couldn’t play. But the random times I didn’t have him I would still get in there!

Number 6 on her list is being out on the town for New Year’s Eve. She prefers to be at home while her kids are in their rooms safely asleep instead of risking to have them all run off the road by a drunk driver. I have a few things to say to this… First, why are you bringing your kids to a party?!?! Second, have you ever heard of a babysitter? And third, girl, you need to have some time out with your husband and New Year’s is the best excuse you could ever have. Go out and have fun! Anyone that knows me knows I have no issue leaving my kids with a sitter and going out on the town, with or without my husband. I need that time away from my kids for my own sanity.

Number 7 on her list is subways and elevators. Yup! FUCKING TERRIFYING! However, this is another one where our fears are a little different. She’s scared her child will get in the elevator, the doors will shut, and they will be taken away somewhere without her. My terror comes from that story about a woman who was on an escalator with her son (I think) and as they came to the top of the elevator the floor (still part of the elevator, you all know what I’m talking about) fell out from beneath them. She threw her son to an onlooker and she fell into the gears (mechanics, machine or whatever you call it) of the escalator. Oh my god! I can not even imagine. Every time I get on and off Bart now unless I’m with my husband because he makes fun of me for doing these types of things, I do a little hop and jump over that part.

There are so many other things that I find terrifying that most people probably think are weird, but most of mine were there long before I had children. For example subways, especially Bart going under the Bay scares me. What if something happened and the water just came rushing in and crushed/drowned us all? Going over any kind of bridge brings on some major anxiety. The longer the bridge the more anxiety I have. Being in tall buildings, amusement rides of any kind, being on boats, being in those underwater aquarium things, and the list goes on. I am pretty good at hiding my anxiety though, thank god. Or else everyone around me would think I was a total nut case. Ahahaha

You can read her full post here.

What kinds of things are you weird about now that you have children? Or have you just always been a weirdo like me?

Summer Semester

Summer semester has officially begun!

I am going to be completely honest with you and tell you all that I am pretty terrified of this semester. I am taking “real” classes that I need and two of them not interest me at all. I have an astronomy class, which is one of those two, so early in the morning! The teacher’s mannerisms are annoying. I can’t eat or drink my Redbull in the class, which really fucks with my whole day. And there’s no one in there over the age of 22. Which is fine I guess, but I loved my classes last semester because there were those random people who were going back to school later in life and we always had this common friendship. Granted they were always significantly older than me, but I was not right out of high school like the rest of our classmates.

Anyway, back to school…

So I have that Astro class and then I have a Psychology class, which should be really great because I like the subject which always makes a class easier. Minus the room doesn’t have AC. (What I mean is it’s broken. And it was broken in that building all last semester as well.) And if you don’t live in the Bay Area let me just give you an idea of what the weather is supposed to be like for the next few days….


Yup, in the 90’s until Saturday. I have class Monday through Thursday. And to make matters worse this isn’t a morning class. This class goes from 10:20 (when it’s already in the 80’s) to 12:35. Hopefully, they get it fixed soon or it’s going to be a really hard 6 weeks.

I also have an Anthropology class online. I am not especially excited about this class but it shouldn’t be too terribly hard. (I hope). It really just checks off a box for my required classes to transfer so I just have to grin and bear it (and get an A of course).

Well, it past midnight (and this was supposed to be a “Monday Minute” post….oops) and I have been doing homework for a little more than 2 hours, on my first day of school. 😦 I am exhausted and going to bed. I hope you all had a wonderful Monday and I will see/chat with you tomorrow! ❤

PS I found this very funny. 🙂

summer classes

Sunday Funday!

I know it’s late and I’m sorry about that. It was Cash’s birthday and Father’s Day so needless to say it’s been a busy day.

I can not believe my little Cash man is 4 already! It seems like it’s gone by so fast! Honestly, it seems like just over a year ago we were moving to the city to live with Tyson and he was only 16 months old. Now he’s 4 and Tate is already 18 months old! It just blows my mind.

We had a birthday party for him yesterday and it just blew me away how many amazing friends we have that love and support our kids. We are so incredibly blessed to have met these wonderful people! He got so many fun presents and has absolutely loved opening and playing with them all. And so has Tate, which Cash is not enjoying so much. ahahaha

Even though today was Father’s Day Tyson got up with the boys this morning and took Cash out for donuts. He got his workout in and then went out with all the “boys” from the gym. I truly think the girls got the better end of this deal. We got to put the kids in Kids World, sit at the bar for a few hours. We got to have lunch and a few drinks then we went out to the pool with the kids and the dads came less than 10 minutes later.

One of the best things about this friend group we have found is that we can just trade off kids. I am more than happy to throw a few kids around in the pool but when I get tired I can pawn them off on someone else and they don’t care at all. We all take our turns and look out for each other.

On the not so fun side of the day, I have been packing up my bag and getting ready for summer semester to start tomorrow. Welcome to 6 weeks of hell. I have a feeling the next 6 weeks are going to be filled with stress, anxiety, jealousy, and frustration. ahahaha Now that I have friends I want to spend time with every weekend I think this will be my last summer semester of classes.

Why should I rush it? ahahaha

I hope you all had a wonderful Father’s Day! Celebrate the dads in your life. They are very special and incredible men!