Safely Ever After – Red Flags

Here is the last of my Safely Ever After posts. This post will focus on the red flags and warning signs parents should be aware of when it comes to the safety of their children.

The best advice I read on this page was to PAY ATTENTION TO WHO IS PAYING ATTENTION TO YOUR KID!

Possible red flags include:

  • Someone who continually tries to arrange time alone with a child, often with lots of reasons or excuses which exclude you
  • Someone who repeatedly befriends one “outstanding” child, singling them out, lavishing them with extra attention, praise, gifts, and/or affection
  • Someone frequently offering favors to “help you out”; for example babysitting for free, transporting a child to activities, free lessons, or taking kids on overnight trips without their parents
  • Someone who uses guilt tactics when the child or parent insists on setting boundaries or limits
  • Someone who insists on being physical with a child (hugging, kissing, tickling, wrestling, lap sitting, etc), even when the child does not want this physical attention
  • Someone who makes inappropriate comments about a child’s looks or body, particularly sexualizing a child
  • Someone who continually invites children to spend time alone at their home, enticing them with the latest video or computer games, toys, gadgets, etc. – especially an adult who does not have children of their own
  • Someone who repeatedly ignores social, emotional, or physical boundaries or limits and seems to have no boundaries of their own
  • Someone who frequently enters a bathroom or locker room where children are changing or showering and does not respect a child’s need for privacy
  • Someone who prefers to spend most of their free time with children and seems to have no interest in age-appropriate relationships or friendships
  • Someone who appears especially preoccupied with one child
  • Someone who seems “just too good to be true”
  • Someone who insists on closed doors and an unobservable environment whenever they are with your child
  • Someone who seeks to isolate the child from others
  • Someone who treats a child as if he or she were older
  • Someone who offers expensive gifts or money to a child for no reason
  • Someone who undermines a parent’s authority by allowing children (especially pre-teens) to engage in behaviors or activities that a parent does not allow
  • Someone who frequently engages in accidental touching, touching games, or invades a child’s personal space
  • Someone who frequently volunteers to rescue a single parent, stepping in and taking care of parental duties, suggesting they can be a “role model” for the child
  • Someone who offers to teach lessons to a child for free as a favor to the parent, when they would normally be paid for this job
  • Someone who uses secrecy or tries to create a special/secretive relationship with one child

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